Loving Is Who God Is

Reverend Philip Stringer

Matthew 18:21-35

LET US PRAY: You, O Lord, are the author of life. Speak to our hearts and fill us with the breath of your Spirit, that we may live and move in your ways, all the days of our life. AMEN

Patty and I served as missionaries in Taiwan from 2002-2005. In preparation for this we participated in a gathering event at University of Chicago with others preparing for service from Lutheran, Episcopalian and Presbyterian churches.

In one exercise we paired up with another person and we were to introduce ourselves to each other. The young man with whom I was paired was from Korea.

I went first and spent 5 minutes telling him I grew up here, went to school here, met my wife there, served churches here, have two daughters, etc.

Next, it was his turn. He told me about his grandparents and what they experienced. He told me about his parents and what they did with their lives. And then his time was up.

It made a great impression on me. Our culture is highly independent. We live more in the moment and are driven by our feelings and interests in the present, with eyes looking ahead at where we want to go.

My friend at the service event came from a culture in which one’s identity is inextricably tied to others. When asked to speak about himself, he believed that you could not know him without knowing the people who had most profoundly shaped him.

Our scripture readings for today draw our attention to a similar point — and underlying them are unspoken questions about who you are, who you want to be, and how you grow into these.

Most of us have a sense of who we are and who we want to be — but how we behave is sometimes at odds with these. As Paul once lamented, “why do I do the things I don’t want to do, and I don’t do the things I do want to do?” It is a struggle at times to live what we believe. Sometimes the only thing that refrains us from what we feel is “bad behavior” may only be our sense that it is socially unacceptable — we fear what others might think if we said or did what we are thinking.

PEOPLE ARE LIKE SPONGES — apply just a little bit of pressure, and you’ll see what they are full of.

In our first reading today, we come midway into a story about the sons of Jacob. As a refresher — Joseph was the youngest of Jacob’s sons and was doted on by his father — so much so that his brothers came to hate him — even to the extent that they eventually plotted to get rid of him. So, they set a trap — literally — throwing him into a pit until a caravan of traders was passing by and they sold Joseph into slavery and then told their father that he had been eaten by wild beasts (which if you think of it wasn’t far from the truth!).

Joseph was carted off to Africa where he served as a slave in Egypt — and long story short — Joseph was clearly blessed by God and rose in favor until he became the second most powerful man in the country, next to the King himself.

God revealed an approaching to famine, so Joseph stored up food and the people were spared — people from far and wide came to Egypt to buy grain and his brothers came also.

When they realized that they were now suddenly under the power of Joseph, they were terrified that he would exact revenge, but he forgave them, instead. He told them, move your entire families here to live under my protection. So, they brought their elderly father and their wives and children there to Egypt.

That’s where the reading picks up. Their father, Jacob has now died and the brothers become terrified again, believing that the only reason Joseph had been showing them kindness was because he wanted to look like a good boy to his father. Now that he was dead, they feared Joseph would rise up against them. They simply can’t believe that he would forgive them, so they cook up a lie — “Dad’s dying words were, ‘don’t hurt them.’”

They didn’t understand what was truly in Joseph’s heart. Faith in the goodness of God freed him to love.

Peter had much the same mindset as Joseph’s brothers — and it is familiar to us, too. Every time we think in terms of tit-for-tat, and eye for an eye — when we think in terms of people getting what they deserve as justice. Every time we believe that we have earned the right to be righteous — we are thinking like Peter and the brothers of Joseph.

When Peter asked Jesus how many times should a person forgive before it’s okay to stop, he is showing that his attention is really on himself. He assumes to be righteous and he wants to know — at what point has he done his duty and can now turn his back on another.

It is a question about limits. And Jesus’ answer to him is quite clear — there is no limit.

The number seven is a number representing a fullness. When Peter wants to measure forgiveness — and patience — and a tie to another person, he says, “is seven times all that is required?” And Jesus says — no, seventy times seven — or more simply put — you will never reach the number.

For you and me, that translates to mean that forgiveness can’t be measured — it isn’t a commodity. It is a manifestation from a state of being.

If Joseph had spared his brothers only because he wanted to look good in his father’s eyes, that would not have been forgiveness at all. It would only be delayed vengeance.

Forgiveness is grace; it is love in action. It was love that caused Joseph to truly let go of the wrong his brothers had done — and his love came from seeing himself as being gathered up within the creation of a loving God. God loved Joseph. God loved his brothers. God loved the people of the world and provided for them. If God loves them, how can Joseph hate them?

Who decides who you will be? Who decides what you will do?

The young man who spoke to me in Chicago saw his identity caught up within the larger context of his parents and grandparents. So, with you and me — we are invited to see the truth of God’s love for us and the world, and to see ourselves within this context. Like Joseph and his brothers, you and I are loved by God. How can we hate those whom God loves?

Why do we let what we dislike about others shape who we are?

Why do we return hate for hate, unkindness of unkindness?

If we judge it to be wrong, why do we then choose to be wrong?

In his letter to the Christians at Rome, Paul addressed the petty infighting that was happening between groups — “we’re right; you’re wrong.”

Paul’s encouragement to them was to stop judging and simply love one another in light of God’s love for them all.

Indeed, it is the gospel — the good news — that God loves us — and forgives us. If God were like us rather than the other way around, God would condemn us all. Truly, that is the judgement we deserve — and which Jesus lifts up as “fair” in terms of eye-for-an-eye justice.

But the one who tells this parable is the one who is going to the cross. When he tells Peter, “Seventy times seven,” he is making it clear that if you are asking how many times you must forgive in order to earn a place of righteousness — then the answer is that it is more than you can possibly do.

You cannot earn your place in heaven. Only God’s love can make room for you there — and that is what God does. Through Jesus, God’s forgiveness reaches beyond what we deserve.

Loving isn’t something God does — it is who God IS.

I think of the young man from Korea who introduced himself to me by telling me about his parents — and I see for us a model of our life as the beloved children of God.

So come to this meal — and celebrate the love of God for you — and let us long to love one another as God loves us.

AMEN